Sofa So Good

The Serjeant at Arms department in the House of Commons is considered by most MPs to be a law unto itself and the real power inside the building. As well as allowing his Sargeness to ponce about in tights wearing a sword, the department is in charge of all sorts of things including the furniture in MPs' offices. So they quickly guessed the culprit when their sofas - so useful for a quick nap after lunch - started disappearing. Apparently, it has been decided that the sofas were too small for two people to sit on without being "over intimate", and over intimacy would never do in the House of Commons. So they are being replaced with single seater armchairs to keep our democratically elected representatives chaste. Carry on, Serjeant.