A Right Hash Of It

John Reid is a bit of a folkie who is no bad hand with an acoustic guitar. Cool in a kaftan as well, perhaps. And is there anything else they would like to get off their chests?

It's Been A Bad Week For The Government

But will things be looking a little rosier for them, and particularly for John Prescott, by the weekend? Not if a lot of people working hard right now have anything to do with it......

My Telly Blew Up Last Night

No, honest, it did. There I was watching 1973, the Rock and Roll Years, on Sky+ from last week or thereabouts, and Bryan Ferry is singing In Every Home A Heartache, which was quite prescient of him bearing in mind the dickhead his son turned out to be, and the f..king thing goes bang and smoke starts pouring out. I did not think they (ie TVs) were supposed to do that anymore. I thought they were supposed to quietly expire and then take themselves down to the recycling centre or whatever and be gently made into plastic pots and Dell computers. But no, this one went out with a, er, bang. And smoke. Now I have to buy a new one. Bastard capitalists.

I Have Been Told Off For Swearing

.......by a number of my co-respondents who feel that occasionally this blog goes too far on the toilet-tongued end of things. Henceforth readers, I hope, will recognise the following abbreviations.
MCW means middle class wankers.
FLC means fucking Labour cunts.
TFD means Tory fucking dickheads.
And Who? means the Liberal Democrats.

As for the BNP, I cannot begin to express it. Although I think the word Nobhead might be involved.

The Big Apple

I am sitting here with the iPod routed throught the stereo listening to a stream of allegedy random music but which does not seem to be. The iPod on shuffle seems to automatically theme, ie you get a stream of 70s, then a stream of 80s etc. Don't really do 90s meself. And the point about iPods is that they go wrong. Mine goes wrong if I try to listen to it through headphones but works fine in my palatial home, apart from the streaming bit. Is this a matter to do with using Windows? Dunno. But the point is that how much are we prepared to let these massive corporations - and Apple, though allegedly hip cool or whatever the street word is, is a massive corporation - rule our lives? They want us to download their music so we don't really own it except through them. And then their stuff doesn't work. So we have to buy a new one. Now I do not want to return to the age of 78s but at least you had it in your hand.

Go On, Ask Him Why He Looks 14

The Europe Minister, Mr Dougie Alexander, has graciously consented to answer questions from the plebs by means of the British Broadcasting Corporation. Tony and Gordon have let him out of school specially.

From the BBC website: "What do you want to know about the European Union?
More than 60 per cent of people surveyed in the UK do not understand the workings of the EU.Initial findings of a study carried out by Eurobarometer on behalf of the European Commission also found people want more information. The minister for Europe, Douglas Alexander MP, will answer your questions on BBC News 24 at 1130bst on Thursday 13 April. What would you like to know about the EU? Do you have a question about how it is structured, staffed or funded and how it affects your life? Send you question for the minister by clicking the button below. This debate will be available on the website later in the day."

Who Do You Love?

Fantastic piece today in Private Eye - despite the fact that they are a bunch of middle class wankers - about the Blair-Brown local government launch love-in. The cheeseyness of it, the pathetic attempts at orchestration, the sheer self-delusion of the main players, which all shows that Blair still has not realised he must simply fuck off and quickly and Brown thinks the people will love him. He must be mad. They will hate him for his detachment, his stealth taxes, his creepy bachelorhood, his terminal gaucheness and his eventual catalogue bride. And the people charged with organising that fiasco (the local goverment launch I mean) all think they are professionals, do they? The Lib Dems and the Tories must be creaming themselves. Professional is not being seen doing it. Ask Charlie Whelan, and mention the Red Lion. Lib Dems again. Also loved the tale of Ian Kirby, alleged political editor of the News of the World, being called in to interview the ridiculous pair and hearing Dave "Over the" Hill, press secretary or something apparently, instructing Tone and Gord to talk to eachother as Kirby approached. Play nice, children, eh? Blair is a vacuous self-seeking wannabe popstar and future celebrity who should have been in Coldplay and hijacked the party of the people, betrayed a generation who yearned for a Labour government under Thatcher and is prepared to get in bed with Bush and Berlusconi. Gordon Brown is a man who makes David Miliband look interesting. Give me Alan Milburn any time. And I hate to say it, but give me call me Dave? Also, the only good thing about David Hill is he is not Alastair Campbell. Which is probably why Campbell effectively sacked him before Hill returned. Still, I wonder how the Kirby story got into Private Eye. Kirby, who has not had a real story in his entire NoW career, was probably boasting in the Press Gallery, and some dreadful snitch told it on. Poor soul. Still, he can always commission another poll. That will give him a story. I hate to say this as an alleged blogger, but the quality of political reporting in the newspapers is at an all-time low compared to what you can find with the judicial use of a mouse (and I do not include myself in that). What a load of bollocks, and if you think that means I do not have any answers, so what. I would not have started from here.